Do Monks Talk to Each Other When No One is Looking?
“The business of business is relationships; the business of life is human connection.” – Robin Sharma
We all seem to have that person or persons that we truly connect with. And while there is certainly a romantic connotation to that sentence, and that’s certainly important (more like paramount), I’m talking intellectually…or even to an extent, spiritually.
About these people, you might say, “they just get it”…or “they just get me”.
It’s a situation where a person seems to understand your point of view while you’re explaining it…and sometimes even before. As if your mind’s eye is seeing the same thing. You’re both subconsciously nodding your head.
Ever experience that?
Well I don’t know about you, but I absolutely love that. In fact, the older I get…the more I wish to talk with those people, and the less I wish to talk to all the rest.
I know that’s not realistic, as any reasonable measure of life requires us to interact with many different people on a regular basis. And I’m not suggesting a monk-like existence (although the older I get, the more I seem to ‘get it’). Further, I love to explore and learn from others…because there is always something to uncover, an insight to be had.
But on this particular point of connection: I think we all fall into a rut where we think of these relationships as the exception, when we should think about them as the rule.
Simply put: If you have people in your life where conversation and existence just seems easier…make it a point to connect with those people, as often as you can.
Seek them out more often. Quench that thirst for conversation that is meaningful for you.
I had a conversation last night with a great friend…one of those who ‘gets it’. We actually talked about this very dynamic. And it got me thinking.
What produces this feeling of deep connection between people?
I don’t really know the answer, but I think there are variables like:
1. Time of life when the relationship started
2. Similar circumstances and/or background
3. Shared interests or goals or pursuits
4. A similar perspective with regard to morality and purpose
All I do know is that when you make that connection, life just seems easier. When you’re around those people, everything just seems easier. Further, when I’m around those people, I actually feel like I’m growing as a person.
So what’s the point?
I guess for me…this morning’s ritual departed from research or reading or viewing some content to absorb, and turned into simple self reflection, drawing from experiences and relationships that I’ve had.
And these thoughts kept occurring to me:
1. If you’re trying to create the conditions for an exceptional life…include the purposeful inclusion of these types of relationships.
2. Seek out this feeling more often. Make time to be with the ones that ‘get it’. Celebrate that.
3. Don’t settle when it comes to personal relationships. You’ve only got so much time and attention.
Might sound like some simple thoughts. Might sound like I’m just saying “hang out with your close friends more”…but that isn’t it.
I’m talking about actively seeking that mental and spiritual connection. I’m talking about including it as a tangible goal. I’m talking about being absolutely mindful of spending as much time as you can with people that seem to be on your frequency.
Don’t we all have those people who we always say we’re going to connect with more? What stops us? Can’t we just decide to call them, or to write them…right now?
Because while I can’t really articulate what happens when you’re around these people, I just know that my mind feels in sync with them. And when my mind feels this way, I think I grow. In fact, sometimes I feel unstoppable.
Thanks for sticking with me on this one. I know you guys ‘get it’.
